This past weekend we were psyched to finally have some time to work outside. However, it started with a rainy and cold Saturday which stalled our plan to paint our decks.
No big deal- as my Dad would always say. NBD, I say, God has other plans for us.
So we worked inside. Plenty of spring cleaning to be had in our new digs. Come Sunday, the weather had cleared up and we got back to the great outdoors.
Yippee! I was on deck detail, only now we decided that I was going to power wash the lower level deck. I had already done the top decks and figured the bottom deck would take me two or three hours.
How wrong was I? Five hours later it was finally complete. My right forearm is still a bit shaky from the vibes and holding down that trigger.
Three hundred minutes with a really loud machine attached to my arm left me a lot of time to think. And let me tell you, I didn’t really like what I was hearing, at first. Things like:
- I’m nervous about this new assignment
- Who do you think you are… to be writing this book
- You’ll never be able to get all this done
From one thing to the next, my thoughts seemed out of control. Nothing good to say- at all. On and on they went. Since I have been praying a whole lot lately, I am absolutely certain that was why I was able to stay detached from all the negativity.
So I just noticed and listened to these thoughts and let them roll through unencumbered like the waves on the water in front of me. Every once in a while though, they got so outlandish that I’d bark, shut up (yes, I really did)!
It made me realize that my thought patterns are just one more way that the enemy comes at me. What I realized while I was power washing this filthy deck (just look at the photos) is that perhaps we need to power wash our thoughts from time to time. Literally, strip them down to their bones and gut them right out of our heads.
Suddenly, I’m nervous about this new assignment became: of course you are! And that’s okay. It is brand new, unlike anything you have ever done before. It is with a different publishing house, no wonder you are nervous. Who says being nervous is a bad thing? You know how to set yourself up for success. You can do this.
Other things like, who do you think you are... were like an explosion and nearly became an expletive: I am a friggin child of God! I was wishing I had a microphone so I could drop that mic right then and there (seriously, five hours is a long time).
It was enlightening and entertaining to give myself this stern talking to. Only I knew I wasn’t really talking to myself. I was setting the record straight now and letting go of old patterns of thought that no longer serve me. I was opening my heart and remembering…
God’s plan for me.
God has put my name and his stamp all over this project. How do I know? It flowed easily to me, it is a perfect fit. I am in complete and utter joy doing this work, that is how I know.
At one point, to show my gratitude I did this:
The photo might not be the best, but with my trigger hand I wrote: I heart Jesus.
It was a great day to do some more spring cleaning. Little did I know that the spring clean was actually an inside job.